I love conspiracies. I love envisioning some crazy not too distant future where some global catastrophic event happens and humans go back to living in tribes on some hunter-gather shit. Or, we have robot overlords. I mean, I really find it hilarious and entertaining, and I also love using real life, present day events and seeing how I can spin it so this present can lead to those nutty future. It’s fun. It’ll never happen though. Why? Because my cell phone freezes and I don’t do shit about it. I just stare at it, maybe give it a little rattle, curse at it and then it blinks and starts acting not-retarded again. And that’s a horrible way to treat a sick thing. Have you ever been around someone who was having a seizure? After that person is done convulsing and choking, the next thing that happens is they get sent to a hospital. Something was not right. You were acting abnormal. You sort of looked like you were back to normal but we aren’t sure so lets go have you checked out. That’s EVERY TIME some shit like that happens. Now, how often do you take your phone to the phone vet? Ever get that thing looked at by a trained cell phone technician when it randomly shuts off and turns back on? No? Your phone fainted while crossing the street and you did nothing. And that is why I believe a robot apocalypse is extremely unlikely to happen. Nobody will be there to fix them when they break.