I Swear I’m Not Angry

Here’s a look into my life. I’m a contractor within the federal government. My current job, I will just say my title is computer operator. So, obviously, the tool of my current trade..actually, not a trade, but fuck it, I sit at a PC all damn day. Most people in this building do the same. If you are a person of fair intelligence, and are around any one thing enough, the tasks dealing with that one thing tend to become easy. Having said that, the complaints about the job should be at a minimum, or at least you’d figure, given most here have put in 5+ years of being here and/or have a college degree that is in someway related to their job. Well, they, the complaints, are not minimal. They are abundant and constant. And I really do not understand why. Ok, I admit that on regular, everyday basis, I say I don’t like my job. But, in my defense, I say it as non-self-titled struggling artist. Well, maybe it is self-titled, as no one has ever actually called me that but I will forever refute that label. What I’m saying is I would much rather be making a living off my creative skill. The people I work with though, I get the sense that they gave up on whatever dreams they had long ago and settled. Then, they bitch about what they settled for. The things I hear these people get emotional about are strange to me. And the attitudes and behavior that follow are even more strange. This particular job, and I will go so far as to say most other positions in this building, seem far too easy and to have any sort of sour attitude or negative demeanor means one of two things. You’re either a miserable cunt to begin with or you’re not as intelligent as the people that hired you thought you were, and just taking your frustration about your lack of intelligence out on the people around.

(1 day later) I don’t even know where I was going with that above rant. So I’ll just leave it and move on to something that bugged me today. I’m listening to the dvdasa podcast and there is an Asian Brit chick on the show. Her voice gives me a very large mental erection. My coworker doesn’t respect this, because she keeps talking some totally, fucking random bullshit about how to communicate with the other people in our area. Now, this would be helpful advice if she had the same outlook on shit as I do. She doesn’t. Wow, that sounded self-centered. This is my shit though. Boom. It seems like she has a bit of baggage and tends to be defensive, even when not under attack. I generally don’t pay attention to the negative opinions of others so I can’t really relate to living life on the defense.

(a couple hours later)This Panera Bread salad is subpar as fuck. I don’t know why I continue to buy salads when I can make a salad that I enjoy more, at home. Poppyseed vinaigrette? Fuck outta here!

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